An alarm clock stuck in wall for 13 years would make me lose my fucking mind

Source– PITTSBURGH — Every day. The alarm clock stuck inside the wall continues to ring. Since September 2004, an alarm clock hidden inside the wall of a home near Pittsburgh goes off every evening.

But why? Well, the homeowner has himself to blame.

Jerry Lynn told KDKA he tied the clock to a string, set it to go off 10 minutes later and lowered it down an air vent to help him find the spot to drill for a television wire. Soon after he lowered the clock, the string broke and the clock fell inside the wall.

“I thought, well, that’s not a real problem,” Lynn told KDKA. “You know it’s still going to go off. And it did.” During daylight saving time, the clock goes off every day at 7:50 p.m. ET (6:50 p.m. ET during standard time).

Before I go off on this dude, I will say that he figured out one pretty ingenious way to a mark a hole. Dropping an alarm down and listening for the sound may seem dumb as fuck but to someone with excellent hearing like this guy it probably worked like a charm and he was able to pinpoint where to drill…. until the absolute unexpected happened and the string broke, stranding that poor alarm clock behind the wall. Now maybe for the first few times, it goes off it’s like alright maybe itll die soon and you ignore it. BUT AFTER 13 YEARS, with that thing fucking ringing in the wall at 7:50 pm EVERY NIGHT I’m either busting that wall down with my bare fists or I’m moving a minimum 3 square miles away. It’s not like this thing is going off in the middle of the day when your out of your house, it’s at 7:50 PM EVERY NIGHT. Finishing up some jeopardy or news or whatever the fuck this type of person watches every night and then hearing…BEEEP… BEEEP… BEEEP…or maybe even worse its one of those that goes BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP, BEEP. And how the fuck does it get turned off?! does it just stop after a certain amount of time? I would have no idea cause I am not psychotic enough to let my alarm go past 30 seconds without having a small freakout but this guy must just wait for it every night at this point. Like a cold beer after work or a good fuck on an anniversary, this guy waits for 7:49 PM every day just say he can sit up against the wall waiting for those BEEPS to come in right on time. -( . )

PS. The real astonishment comes when you think about the fucking batteries. What does he have standard Duracells in there? If these things are lasting for 13 years let me be the first to cop a 24 pack of these mufss. Lemme know man.

Eminem proves you can do anything if you just believe


Eminem has worked his entire life for this moment. He has officially had a word entered in the Oxford dictionary because of a song he wrote. “Stan”, from his song “Stan”, about an obsessed fan named Stan has been given an exact definition and solidified in the ink of the dictionary. Now I’m gonna be honest, I’ve never actually said this or even had it said to me so maybe bigger cities use it more but this came way out of left field for me. Now that I’m aware doe….imma be a stan of everything I used to be a fan for. I stan for the Packers (Go Pack Go), I stan for water,  fuck being a fan, thats pussy shit. Through his entire career, Eminem has won numerous Grammys, Globes, academys, blowjobs, etc but I truly think that this is what he has been aiming for his entire career. Its no secret that he used to just read the dictionary as a young wanna-be rapper to expand his vocabulary and while reading that dictionary he probably made a mission for himself to someday be in the very book he is reading. And now he’s done it, King Em, all hail.  So now that this is actually a word I am all in on it and you should be too.

Be a stan, not a fan. -( . )

Started from the Bottom

As you entered this world you nuzzled up to your momma’s supple breasts and you sucked with all your might to get that milk, that fuel, that helped you grow into the strapping fucking lad I’m sure you are. And now with Straight From The Tit we hope to fuel your day with posts that make you wait till the last second to close your screen as your Lumberg strolls by the ol’ cube.

-( . )